ITV You know what’s been missing from Clownton Abbey? Sexual violence. Oh sure we’ve had barbecued Cousin Barry from the Titanic, yeah we’ve had Cousin Matthew‘s sprained vagina and subsequent paralysis and truedat we’ve had Branson Pickle the Mick‘s dangerous Fenian outbursts but the sex so far has been pretty universally consensual. That all changes… Read More

ITV Previously on Downton Abbey: Mary did the Monster Mash. It was a graveyard smash. It’s been a rough time for the walking tabula rasa that is Lady Mary so to cheer her up Dead Matthew sends a letter from beyond the grave saying he wants her to be sole heir. Lord Blob is being… Read More