Showtime
Previously on Homeland: Saul locked the incoming CIA director in a room and Javadi told Carrie the Langley bomber was still in the country. Dar Adal works his Jew voodoo by rattling Leland Bennett‘s cage about his firm’s links to Langley (or “big fucking crater” as it now prefers to be known). It works a treat. Bennett shows his ‘bovvered?’ face to Adal but privately gets onto his boy Franklin with the quickness telling him to find out what a gwan. He hits up Carrie who tells him “yeah bro – they totally know the bomber is still in the country”. Franklin reports back to Bennett and they agree that getting their bomb happy client out of the country would be prudent.
As would contraception when you’re a three-post ment with a history of poor choices with men but Carrie’s a renegade who plays by her own rules. At the 13 weeks sonogram she admits boozing like a Barrymore, doing lithium like Cobain and stressing like a Rimmy Savile chauffeur reading an Operation Yewtree report.
At the 13 weeks sonogram she admits boozing like a Barrymore, doing lithium like Cobain and stressing like a Rimmy Savile chauffeur reading an Operation Yewtree report.
At this rate the kid will be born so retarded he’ll end up as a scriptwriter on Reign. The doctor tells her to knock that shit off but Carrie replies that she is working on something to do with junior’s father which at least eliminates any doubt that it is Brody’s seed gestating inside of her, cracked off its noggin on stress chemicals, bourbon and happy pills. Poor fucker’s got a better chance of reaching full-term on the foetal killing fields of Breathless.
At this rate the kid will be born so retarded he’ll end up as a scriptwriter on Reign.
Mira decides to give her marriage with Saul another go and to this end she dumps teedy borefriend Alain and he seems pretty miffed about it. Later he breaks in and sticks a bug on Saul’s computer. For personal or professional reasons we don’t know but unfortunately we don’t seem to have heard the last of him.
When the time comes for Franklin to extract the bomber (some faceless cracka-ass cracker who you’d shoot on sight without knowing the first thing about him) from his motel hideout Secret Service strike teams await ready to pounce. Carrie notices that Franklin is attaching a silencer onto a weapon and in one of those brilliant moments of blue sky eureka thinking only mentals can have she deduces that the only extracting Franklin will be doing is extracting the bomber from this mortal coil.
Carrie deduces that the only extracting Franklin will be doing is extracting the bomber from this mortal coil.
Dar Adal is cool with that because to act now would blow Javadi’s cover but Carrie is as determined to clear Brody’s name as she is to irreversibly tard their unborn child. She ignores his direct order to stand down and hares after Franklin. Adal gives the order to shoot the fruitcake and Agent Quimm obliges by putting one in her tits – non-fatal fortunately. As expected Franklin shoots the bomber in the face then gives him a warm relaxing acid bath. Langley Bomber Esq. pretty much had that one coming. As Carrie is driven away in the ambulance she freaks out and wonders vocally and hysterically where Saul at?
Carrie is as determined to clear Brody’s name as she is to irreversibly tard their unborn child.
*Chalky White voice* I tell you where he at. He at the Tower of David in Caracas, Venezuela dropping off the $10 million reward to El Niño who presents him with the blankly staring heroin soused Dickless Brony. Turns out that favour he owed Carrie wasn’t worth all that much after all. Still he might be able to get a roof on the place now.
The verdict: Abort the mission or abort the baby.
Marks out of 10: 7.5
