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By Any Means episode one review | Do the Hustle

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Do you know what the police procedural needs? A crew of renegade cops who don’t play by the rules. It’s never been tried before but By Any Means breaks new ground like Justin Lee Collins breaks his girlfriend’s will to live. Warren Brown is maverick cop Jack Quinn. Quim is running an off-the-books police department from a basement shitbox. Their authority seems to come from the shadowy Helen Barlow (Gina McKee) who may be a spook or concerned billionaire we don’t really know. His sidekicks are Thomas “TomTom” Tomkins (Andrew-Lee Potts) a computer nause with a smart mouth and Jessica Jones (Shelley Conn) – bright, tough and gets right to the point. They don’t give a rat’s ass about the law, they just want to nail some scrotes. We can relate.

A crew of renegade cops who don’t play by the rules. It’s never been tried before but By Any Means breaks new ground like Justin Lee Collins breaks his girlfriend’s will to live.

The first case is to stitch up crime boss Nicholas Mason (Keith Allen).  Three acquittals in 5 years – he’s making them look a right shower of cunts. In the last heist he pulled the strings on some poor sap called Cummings got shot dead in the head leaving his wife and daughter widowed and dadless. Mason got off at the trial even though one of his goons Raymond Nash (Richard Lumsden) turned grass against him. He’s just slippery like that.

The first case is to stitch up crime boss Nicholas Mason (Keith Allen).  Three acquittals in 5 years – he’s making them look a right shower of cunts.

Quim’s first priority: to rattle Dickless Mason. He first targets a couple of coppers suspected of being Masons moles in the crime squad: DC Charlie O’Brien (Elliot Knight) and Chris Henney (Ben Cartwright) Quim visits O’Brien but gets quickly shown the door. Never mind – cold calling criminals is a thankless task. Tom and Jess get work on pestering Mason with unpaid parking fines, tax hassle, brick through the window. Accessing his medical files reveals he sees a shrink for his anger management issues. He flies into jealous rages and his young hot wife is the trigger (and not just because she looks like a horse).

He flies into jealous rages and his young hot wife is the trigger (and not just because she looks like a horse).

Than they can use. They Photoshop a picture of his wife with Nash the grass and that pushes all the right buttons. Mason bugs out like his name was Phife Dawg.  He and his people intercept a van transporting Nash to a new safe house. Dickless is armed, dangerous and brings along bent cops O’Brien & Henney and ruthless killer Jock Hardman from bonny Scotland (played by Russ Abbot‘s Jimmy character). Snitches are about to get stitches.

But wait, when Dickless and friends burst open the back of the van they find Quim and Jess happy to shower them with money from the Cummings robbery. What on earth? Oh they’re setting him up, as previously agreed. Armed police arrive. Turns out both O’Brien and Jock Hardman were working undercover for Quim. Hustle style flashback reveals how they worked their clandestine magic. I’ll tell you these guys are good.

Black Ops cops riding roughshod over due process does have a certain appeal. I imagine it will get a couple of series before they shitcan it, citing musical differences or male menopause.

And it’s in that Sunday night tradition of slick un-taxing procedural that will divert and entertain but you’ll never remember the next day. Black Ops cops riding roughshod over due process does have a certain appeal. I imagine it will get a couple of series before they shitcan it, citing musical differences or male menopause. Don’t expect a life changer and this won’t disappoint.

The verdict:  Adequate and tolerable.

Marks out of 10: 7

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