BBC Two
You know the really depressing thing about Uri Geller? Apart from everything he says, does and is I mean. It’s that military intelligence in more than one country employed him for his non-existent psychic powers. The Secret Life of Uri Geller includes interviews with Geller confirming what he’s hinted at for some time – he was employed as a psychic spy by gullible lackbrain fucknuts paranoid that Russia was developing psychics for their own ends. “The Soviets are acting up – let’s get that guy off the telly to draw a circle in a triangle” pretty much a direct quote.
We hear how he fought in the army the six-day war where he first came to the attention of the not very bright. He met future Israeli Prime Minister Benjamin Netanyahu who still calls him a personal friend and is still amazed by his parlour tricks that you could easily teach to a 9-year-old. “I haven’t the faintest idea how he does these things”.
Geller has been exposed more times than Rihanna’s arse and yet still people queue around the block to tell him he’s the chosen one.
Well you can’t have tried very hard. Geller has been exposed more times than Rihanna’s arse and yet still people queue around the block to tell him he’s the chosen one. Derren Brown routinely pulls off more impressive feats of mentalism, suicide attempts and armed robbery and you don’t see him being employed by the military (though if he laid on the mystic woo shtick you can bet they’d have him installed in a secret facility trying to cook a rotisserie chicken with his mind).
Derren Brown routinely pulls off more impressive feats of mentalism, suicide attempts and armed robbery and you don’t see him being employed by the military (though if he laid on the mystic woo shtick you can bet they’d have him installed in a secret facility trying to cook a rotisserie chicken with his mind).
Geller had already done work for Mossad when crank scientists Hal Puthoff and Russell Targ (author of such totally scientific works as Old Souls: The Scientific Evidence For Past Lives) got on his dick. They became prominent supporters of Geller. Puthoff was key in implementing Stanford Research Institute‘s remote viewing program – a program where people pretended to see things far away with the power of their shit brains. Remarkably, mainstream science didn’t take the research seriously.
Jon Ronson’s The Men Who Stare at Goats dealt with Psi-Ops and explored “the apparent madness at the heart of U.S. military intelligence.” That’s the military. It’s the gullibility among the scientists that is truly shocking. (If you want to know the extent of paranormal researcher stupidity it’s worth reading up on James Randi’s Project Alpha).
Guller revels in the notoriety but of course he can’t talk about the really good stuff. He can’t possibly comment on the rumour that he knocked out Egyptian radar systems for the Entebbe raid. He’s not denying it either. You generally get the impression that he can’t believe he’s got away with this for so long.
Fun to think about though isn’t it??? If the Germans try again we are done.
The verdict: Hal Putoff and Russell Tard. Savagery prevails.
Marks out of 10: 7.5
