BBC Four
Previously on The Bridge: The Fox and his friends got all up in Saga‘s grill like BLAW! Do you really fink Saga gonna have dat? Hell naw, mami. She disarms that gun toting pig and whips him until his bacon is cooked. The rest of them fall into line like scared animals and she marches them down to the police station like a cattle herder. The interrogation is tough but Piggy is not squealing. He’s Carl Sjoberg, the boss of this particular idiot cell. They’re copycat terrorists, essentially a tribute band to the Friends of Faxborg. No offence but that’s weak, bro.
On to more pressing matters. Once Claudio shows up dead in the park it’s not long before Caroline pieces things together and gets Alexander arrested. Saga notes a couple of important things from the initial examination of Claudio’s body. Firstly, he has the same poison in him as was found in the Faxborg cases. Secondly and more importantly, his penis was not very big. Saga tells Martin that Jakob is only packing four inches fully erect and she still gets a more than adequate ride. In a completely minor trivial point: Claudio was alive when Alexander left him so the question is: who poisoned him?
Over in Medisonus HQ Victoria continues her way through her bucket list, getting a tattoo as her dickless brother Oliver watches. Then she talks to Bodie about the autobiography. Victoria insists that Bodie divulge a secret no one else knows and Bodie tells her she’s fucking Caroline’s husbland. Apparently even Caroline’s husbland doesn’t know. That’s pretty ill.
Speaking of ill Nikolaj is diagnosed with a throat infection in his kidneys. It’s probably AIDS say the doctors silently with their eyes. Saga, possessed with some kind of sixth sense or insider knowledge, breaks into Mette‘s gaffe and discovers that weird nanny Anna-Dea is destroying the youngster with blood-pressure medication. Saga is no psychiatrist yet she instantly diagnoses it as Munchausen’s syndrome by proxy. The doctor wonders how much she knows about it. Did this happen to Saga? Martin asks Pernille to look up Saga’s sister’s suicide at 14. Maybe that will explain why she’s weird?
Nikolaj is diagnosed with a throat infection in his kidneys. It’s probably AIDS say the doctors silently with their eyes.
Such insight may come too late to help her relationshit with Jakob. His mother-in-law coming to stay means no sex that night and so the following morning Saga masturbates furiously over him while watching him and his tiny four inch cock. She doesn’t achieve completion and he freaks out when he sees what she’s up to – pounding the little man in the boat. It’s all terribly frustrating for Saga and the viewers alike.
The following morning Saga masturbates furiously over him while watching him and his tiny four inch cock.
At least there’s a development in the case that should get her juices flowing. A boat is recovered from the seabed with seven corpses on it, all of them shot. The little man in the boat is getting a really tough time of it this week. It’s a Marcus Stenborg vessel again and for someone who claims to be innocent he’s looking awfully non-innocent at the moment. A caravan dwelling stoat claiming to have sunk the ship tries to blackmail him as the episode ends. I get the feeling will be hearing more from this stoat and Marcus Stenborg too whose nautical record is looking increasingly like Jonah’s.
The verdict: Frigging in the rigging.
Marks out of 10: 8